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October 04, 2006

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Comments

Jamie

I really liked your blog post because you described the way the Native American appeared before going to Washington, D.C. and after going. With your description I was able to get a good picture in my head about the Native American dress. In your post though, I would not use the word “us,” instead I would use someone or one. Another thing that I noticed was that there was a grammatical error in the first sentence (“…to change their outdated ways our get out of the land.”). The last thing is that I thought that your thesis statement does not really fit what the rest of your post is talking about.

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